Interviewing Simon Jones

Tell us a little about where you grew up. What was it like there?

Unlike me, my past is unremarkable, but I will not get ahead of myself. You may have noticed I speak well. That is because for a long time I lived in a well-to-do area of Austrshir City, but I was born in a family of riversiders. You don’t know what that means? We lived next to the Ophidian River. A beautiful body of water rich in life, winding its way through the Arid Lands. It enters the east side of the city, where people built their homes next to its banks, hence the name ‘riversiders’. By the time the river flows through the city’s centre and out of the west quadrant, where grime meets beauty, all that remains in its currents is death.

For a boy of my talents, the city was a wondrous place.

Did you have any favourite toys as a child? Any cherished memories?

Toys? If people are toys, then yes, I had plenty. My brother had a sadistic side and enjoyed hurting small things. I was smaller than him. Luckily for me I feel pain differently from others. He, on the other hand, didn’t. Before he drew his last breath, he understood what refined sadism looks like. Is that a ‘cherished memory’, as you put it? No.

I remember the first time I understood that you do not have to be big to render a lion toothless. Having the right information presented at the right time can achieve the same result. A fine memory I have comes from a young me, no older than ten, blackmailing a rich merchant who caught us in his warehouse. I make a point of knowing people.

What do you do now?

I lead a regiment of talent-rich criminals. For those with ears listening in the right places, we are a precision instrument. To the rest, with hearing attenuated to less informed communications, we are ‘the Condotto’, a group leaving chaos in its wake. We perform work for the king nobody else can accomplish.

My duties are to liaise with royalty and their regents, canvas available opportunities, and execute against objectives. I keep my regiment ship-shape and in line.

I neither know nor care what my compatriots have done. I care only for what they can do.

What can you tell us about your latest adventure?

Latest adventure? Well … I suppose each opportunity is an adventure.

Our current objective is to coerce, or remove, the Lizardwalker tribe. The regent feels Cossak and his tribe are proving too difficult to eradicate by conventional means, and he would like a return on his investments in that region sooner rather than later. He even offered a sizable bonus for killing their new chief, a young man named Cossak. I confess to irritation at the incentive, a condition I rarely suffer. Assassination is a simple endeavour, lacking in the kind of nuance I enjoy. Better to have the target voluntarily neuter themselves. However, what makes this interesting are the powers their shaman has, a man close to Cossak. Normally I dismiss such things, but these rumours have a different tone to them. I am intrigued.

Have you been to the Arid Lands before? Have you met Cossak? (Please edit)

I have not made Cossak’s acquaintance yet, but I will when I deem it necessary. As for the Arid Lands, yes, we have been there before, and have spent time with some Gundese tribes, but not the Lizardwalkers. The Gundese knowledge of survival in hot, dry lands has proven invaluable to us in the past.

I enjoy their culture: truthful and open. Traits I can exploit. Their time is coming to an end.

What was the scariest thing in your adventures?

I can say without ego or embellishment: nothing scares me. But your question evokes a memory … of a woman. She was—is—special. Unique. In her, I found understanding. She … I suppose I would call her a kindred spirit. I would say that is the closest I have come to experiencing fear.

As kindred as we are, two hunters can not co-exist in the same territory.

What is the worst thing about what you do? (Please edit)

Talking to old people. A marvelous conceit, given my advancement in years, but there it is. So many of them carry regret and wish to share their wisdom. I have no stomach for it.

Children, on the other hand, well, that is another matter. Full of possibility, and so very useful.

What is the best thing about being in the Condotto?

Except for conversations with the elderly and travel, we never have a dull moment. We have traveled the length and breadth of the kingdom, its provinces and the Arid Lands — soon to become another kingdom province. Now and again our work takes us to seedier and less well-to-do places, or the corridors of royalty. In such places we occasion upon a most stimulating individual.

We change the destiny of countries. That, I would say, is the most gratifying aspect of our work.

Tell us a little about your friends.

I shall disavow you of the notion of friendship amongst my compatriots. Our backgrounds are chequered, and kept behind locked lips. You, very likely a normal person and reasonable in your expectations, would easily think of us as friendly, perhaps believing under other circumstances we could become friends. Our amicable demeanour is a ruse to forward our objective. So too my relationship with the individuals in the regiment.

Any romantic involvement?

I feel your question is more tuned to what normal people would think of as romance. I have no use for it, other than to further my current assignment.

But, the woman I mentioned earlier. If there is anyone who could ‘make my heart sing’, as it were, it would be her.

Whom (or what) do you really hate?

My father. An exceptionally intelligent man, but thoroughly weak and possessed the backbone of a dog. Born as a riversider, he spent his time in this world in servitude, trading the endless possibilities his intellect provided to care for his family through menial slavery.

What’s your favourite drink, colour, and relaxing pastime?

Water. I do not drink wine or mead. It clouds the mind. Not do I partake in yellow musk or song herb, for the same reason.

I do enjoy standing on the prow of a ship as it approaches new lands. The possibilities on new shores are endless. Until they are not. But before that moment happens, I am excited at the prospect.

What does the future hold for you?

For a long time, the Ka’Akrato nation to the south of the Emerald Kingdom has been poised to make war. To date, this has been averted through diplomatic channels. The king grows tired of this, and is looking for alternate means to avoid an expensive war while getting the better of our southern neighbours. I dare say that will be our next assignment once we remove Cossak and his tribe from the board.

Can you share a secret with us, which you’ve never told anyone else?

Ree-Nariya, the trailblazing emissary assigned to the Arid Lands, is a widow. This you already know. Her husband was assassinated.

So I am told.

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